Thursday, September 1, 2011

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Sooo... I've gotten called out about not blogging in my own blog.

I would say it was because I had nothing positive to blog about. It started with Girl Scout cookie season and went downhill from there.

But I guess I didn't start this blog to be all roses and sunshine. If it were that easy I would have no reason to start a blog, huh?

This shit is hard. And with all of the life adjustments I've been through over the past few months - really the past year - I'm lucky I haven't eaten myself into a coma. But I know that reprieve is only temporary if I don't get my ass into gear.

I think it might be time for some serious detox. The type that causes headaches and moodiness. Now, I could ease into it... but then I'll just be one cookie away from a sugar nap again. I gotta pray on this, I really do.

As soon as I learn how to blog from my phone, I'll post more. Can't do it from work, all blogs are blocked... ain't that some shit. Like I can't blog and work at the same time.

Toodles y'all!

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Getting back to "Normal"

So I mentioned I went to the doctor, and it was a really great visit. I love my doctor, he is very personable and very passionate about diabetes since both of his parents have it. We looked at what I needed to be taking (my medicine use has been sporadic at best, pure denial) and he put me on my same dosages and wants to see me in a month.

So now I am back on those medicines and testing my glucose at least twice a day. Right now my body is going through an interesting tug of war. The body is so resilient, and when you are a diabetic your body will adjust to whatever your usual or consistent blood sugar levels are. Whether those levels are healthy or not. So when your body is used to higher levels and you take medicines to combat that (in combo with better diet) - your body has to go through withdrawal and adjust to the "new normal". Many folks who have done a low carb diet will recognize this feeling, it feels like having a mild case of the flu for about 2-3 days. And then after that you're good.

Well, I'm on day 4 of eating better and day 2 of being back on full meds. Yeah. I feel like isht. I mean I feel great that I'm doing the right thing, but my body feels like isht. This usually becomes the do or die phase, so to speak. I'll speak more in terms of diet than just meds.

Think about day one of a new way of eating. You are all gung ho. Day two is okay, but you are starting to feel the difference physically and mentally. Day 3 is when you start to really miss some of the old things and think "Can I really do this?" And it is either "Hayle yeah, I can do this!" or "Hayle naw, where are the chocolate chip cookies?"

I'm tentatively on the Hayle Yeah side. Only because I know I can and each day it will get easier. Not easy. But easier.

I want to be around to enjoy my life. I want to love up on my wonderful husband and watch my beautiful sons live their best lives. I don't want to die early from something I could have prevented. I don't want to beg my son or a relative for a kidney because I destroyed my own.

I want to live. Hayle yeah.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Hi All! My first shot at blogging...

I'm not quite sure what led me to start this blog. Well - let me back up. I'll let you in on what I was feeling before I decided to start it. I was tired of feeling defeated by diabetes and went to see my doctor about it. And it occurred to me that there were others out there that might be feeling defeated as well and were tired of those who minimize our condition and what it takes to control it.

Also, there might be some folks out there that know and love people with this disease - but don't know much about it. Or they may know the logical, medical information but not the emotion that can go along with it.

There are some diabetics that are able to snap right into shape after diagnosis in maintaining a healthy blood glucose level. I am infinitely proud of them because it takes will and self-control. But there are also some of us who have a few challenges (okay, a lot) - and maybe need to hear someone else vocalizing what they are feeling. And that's okay. This here thing is a journey.

I will celebrate in this blog. I will laugh, I will surely cry, I might curse (reformed pottymouth), and I will release. And I will talk about any and everything I need to - as I am Val before I am a diabetic. My only rule in this blog is that I cannot lie to myself. This is my safe place.

Welcome, and I hope you enjoy your stay.